A constant state of doom, gloom and dread.
Feelings of hopelessness and struggle.
Feelings of constant sorrow and sadness that hang onto your every thought your every waking moment.
Going to bed at night and praying to God, “Please take me home. Dear God, let me wake up with you.”
Waking in the morning, old familiar feelings still hang on, tears well up in your eyes. ” I am still here still alive.”
The constant thought, “Is this my life? I don’t want this any more.”
Does this sound familiar? I hope not, because these are the feelings of suicide. How do I know? I know because these were my feelings, my thoughts. For years I was LOST, HOPELESS and filled with FEAR. If this is you, GET HELP. You are worth it and you are loved even though you think you may not be. Talk to your loved ones, talk to someone you trust, share your feelings don’t hide them. I share this with you so you know there is a way out of the pain and fog. The fog that so often with suicide is created from the MEDS that are supposed to help but in reality many times your thoughts get darker and keep you in a place where you are unable to control the rampant thoughts that run around in your head of doom and gloom.
To those of you who have or are having thoughts of suicide, I want you to know it DOES GET BETTER. Today and for some years now I am the happiest I have ever been in my entire life. I live my life in joy, happiness, love and gratitude. God did not make any mistakes. You are perfect and being happy is your BIRTHRIGHT. FIND THAT HAPPINESS it is there for you.
EVERY LIFE IS WORTH LIVING EVERY BEING IS WORTH LIVING. – a message from the other side.
Find happiness, seek it out. It is there for you. Talk to someone, talk to your loved ones. My husband’s love saved me. I did not do it because I know it would have blown a hole in his life and I did not want to cause him that kind of pain and blame. I did not want him thinking that it was his fault, thinking that he could have stopped me. I did not want him to wonder, “Why didn’t I do something? Why didn’t I see it?” Suicide leaves a hole in the hearts of the ones you leave behind. It leaves them filled with blame, guilt, pain and regret and often the thoughts of them wishing they were with you.
For those who have lost a loved one to suicide, I want you to know it is not your fault. Please let go of the blame and guilt you carry. I have read many parents who have lost their loved ones to suicide. I have connected with the spirits that have committed suicide and they have come through and have said that no one could have stopped them. They were out of control of their own thoughts and the FOG became to heavy. Suicidal people hide their feelings, they put on a “happy face” most often to the loved ones in their life. They do this because they don’t want to hurt the ones they love. So often they believe that if they were not here that their loved ones would be happier.
Suicide leaves a hole in the hearts of the loved ones left behind because they are filled with blame and guilt. Please don’t blame yourself. Don’t fill your heads with “should haves” or “why didn’t I’s”. Don’t blame, berate, belittle, judge or criticize yourself. Practice self love and self compassion, you need to heal, allow yourself to heal. They did not do it because of you, the pain pushed them to it, and many times they don’t show that kind of pain and despair to anyone but themselves. Their pain is kept hidden from you so in their mind they don’t hurt you.
Suicide is something that is not talked about as it is a very taboo subject and often not enough prevention is done in schools or communities. We need to educate our young ones and talk to them, help them to understand that they are not alone that there are other ways to feel better about themselves. Each and everyone of us is a unique individual and many of us don’t fit into certain molds that society thinks we should. We need to let people know that it is okay to be different, unique, that we are all special.
Here is another great page to read if you are experiencing suicidal thoughts. www.metanoia.org/suicide
Peace and Love Linda